I Don't Want to Kill You
Dan Wells
Top 10 Best Quotes
“We're taking you to the hospital,' it said, 'you're going into shock. Can you tell us how you feel?' 'I feel ...' What do I feel? I guess that's good enough. I feel.”
“Hello, Bradley,' said Mom. She'd regained her composure after my outburst, and now raised her camera. 'Stand close.' 'No, Mom,' I said. 'No pictures.' 'But you're friend's here now,' she said, waving us together. 'Smile!' 'I don't need a picture with-' the flash snapped '-another guy. That's great, Mom, thank you. Send that one to Dad and tell him we're going steady.”
“Life is too short. It's too precious. We have to live in this world, but we don't have to wallow in it. We don't have to fill our lives with all of this darkness.”
“Dead bodies are calm and silent—perfectly still, perfectly harmless. A corpse will never move, it will never laugh, and it will never judge. A corpse will never shout at you, hit you, or leave you. Far away from the zombies and junk that you see on TV, a corpse is actually the perfect friend. The perfect pet. I feel more comfortable with them than I do with real people.”
“I'm not scared anymore, I just ... I don't know. I think it's because I saw someone else, someone behind your face, like you'd taken off a mask. It was still you, but it wasn't. And I don't think that person is going to hurt me, or Marci, or anybody else, but ... I guess the thing is that I don't know anything about that person. At all. And that's what scares me more than anything - that there could be two people, so different, and one of them so secret.”
“[...] Mom’s not keeping me out because it’s a dead friend, she’s keeping me out because it’s a dead sixteen-year-old girl with no clothes on’ ‘And that’s officially the creepiest thing you’ve ever said,’ said Lauren. She stopped typing, and then grimaced and shivered, like she’d just eaten something disgusting. ‘Seriously – yuck.’ I smiled. ‘I’ve got a live girlfriend – what do I need a dead one for?’ […] Lauren folded her arms. ‘How do I know you’re not just trying to get her out of the house for your own nefarious purposes?’ I smiled. ‘What kind of trouble am I going to get into? The dead girl doesn’t get here until tomorrow.”
“You don’t have to march into hell every single time they open the gate.”
“It may surprise you to know this, but there are children--some of them teenage boys, just like you--who actually carry on open, honest conversations with their mothers." "I find it very hard to believe that there are other teenage boys just like me." I finished my cereal and stood up. "I also find it a little terrifying.”
“So you went bike riding, then," she said. "Just around town? Out on the forest trails somewhere?" "Yes," I said, "we went out to Forman's place." Her face twisted, eyes widening, eyebrows curling, nostrils flaring. It was her "shocked" face, with a dash of "confused." "Really?" "Of course not," I said, "but the face you just made almost makes this conversation worth it.”
“a corpse is actually the perfect friend. The perfect pet. I feel more comfortable with them than I do with real people.”
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Book Keywords:
john-cleaver, humor, jokes, hilarious, mom, demon, john, funny, feelings, dead-body, necrophilia, sociopath, serial-killer, sister, pictures, dance
