Zombie Spaceship Wasteland
Patton Oswalt
Top 10 Best Quotes
“If the victories we create in our heads were let loose on reality, the world we know would drown in blazing happiness.”
“Zombies can't believe the energy we waste on nonfood pursuits.”
“People will find transformation and transcendence in a McDonald's hash brown if it's all they've got.”
“I want to experience as many different tastes, sights, emotions, conflicts, and cultures as possible, so that I can expand the canvas of my memory and enrich my comedy.”
“Cheap liquor is a magic potion that can turn you into a puppet cowboy before it kills you.”
“Its gaze unlocked a room in my nightmares which should have remained closed.”
“Anything's better than Gen X which is what we got. Thanks Douglas Coupland. We sound like a team of mutant vigalantees with frosted hair and chain wallets. Actually that's not completely horrible.”
“Roddy the assistant manager lived in the theater. He'd emptied out one of the supply closets. He'd installed an inflatable mattress, a Shower Anywhere portable shower, and a wee television. He slept amid the powdered-butter fumes and empty drink-syrup tanks. He had grub-white skin and Goth circles under his eyes that, unlike those of Goths, came from really, truly existing half in the world of the dead. He smelled like carpeting, Scotch tape, and steak sauce. He was almost forty but had one of those half mustaches that thirteen-year-olds have. He was the closest thing to a zombie I've yet encountered in this world.”
“hobos' (a slang term that combines the words 'hope' and 'bowl of beans given to me for free by a woman who then initiated intercourse')”
“I'm sitting at the bar, rearranging the order of my jokes. I'm under the delusion that I'm having bad shows because of some cosmic misalignment of words, phrases, and ideas. I may as well have cast runes into a spirit bowl, hoping that the collective heart of the audience would open to my necromantic call. Maybe that's how jugglers do it. Those guys never have shitty sets.”
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Book Keywords:
inspiration, necromantic-comedy, humor, douglas-coupland, transcendence, jokes, experience, jugglers, satire, casting-runes, patton-oswalt, present-tense, stand-up, liquor, comedy, spirit-bowl, inspirational, zombies
