How to Sell a Haunted House
Grady Hendrix
Top 10 Best Quotes
“wishing harder than she’d ever wished before that for just sixty seconds someone would hold her, but no one holds moms.”
“Mothering, manipulating—sometimes there wasn’t a difference. She’d learned that from her mom.”
“I’ll come right out and say it,” Mercy told them. “Strange noises, bad vibes, your mom and dad recently passed— Your house is haunted and I’m not selling it until you deal with that.”
“You’ve become such a grouch,” she said. “Having your arm sawed off will do that.”
“You’re going to hurt the feelings of all those new library books,” Louise said, and instantly Poppy’s eyes got wide. “They’re going to be sad you didn’t want to read them first. You’re going to make them cry.”
“Time only moves in one direction no matter how hard we wish it wasn’t so.”
“puppet is a possession that possesses the possessor.”
“When you don’t like the way a conversation is going you deflect with personal attacks. You’re like some kind of emotionally abusive octopus entangling everyone in your word tentacles.” “You should talk to your therapist about your choices of imagery,” Mark said. “Pipe organs, octopuses—it’s very revealing.”
“These are our parents!” Louise shouted, the first time she’d shouted at an adult maybe ever. “They’re not a doughnut! You don’t split them in half.”
“She checked underneath the sink but didn’t see anything that might destroy an evil puppet.”
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