Codependency for Dummies
Darlene Lancer
Top 10 Best Quotes
“When we let go of our reactions and detach from other people's moods, actions, and words, we take back our power. Instead of reactors, we become self-determined actors in our lives. We take charge of ourselves and decide how we act in that moment and every moment, skyrocketing our self-esteem”
“In fact, it’s said that in every misunderstanding there are six people involved: the couple and two sets of parents.”
“stating clearly and politely what you think, feel, need, or want.”
“some of the following poor communication habits:”
“persistent accusations or pleas for attention or reassurance can produce your worst fear and push them away.”
“and let live: This is my favorite saying. Its meaning is very powerful. When you give yourself permission to do what you want, then you’re able to give others that freedom. It defines correct boundaries. You’re the only one over whom you have power, and only you are responsible for yourself. You discover that your actions create your happiness. The four don’ts: The four don’ts remind you not to focus on, have expectations of, judge, or spend your time thinking about others. Don’t watch. Don’t expect. Don’t judge. Don’t obsess.”
“Withdrawers (“I don’t want to talk about it.”)”
“When you’re tempted to react, try these strategies:”
“Stand with your eyes closed and lean slightly forward then back. Imagine that leaning forward means “Yes” and backwards means “No.” Now stand still and ask yourself a yes or no question. Close your eyes and see which way you sway. With practice, this can be a handy tool to access your body’s wisdom in making decisions.”
“Often in conjoint therapy, one partner (the pursuer) complains that the other (the distancer) is too busy”
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Book Keywords:
self-esteem-quotes, autonomy, detachment, codependency, nonattachment, empowerment
