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The INTP: Personality, Careers, Relationships, & the Quest for Truth and Meaning

A.J. Drenth

Top 10 Best Quotes

“Because INTPs are relatively ill-equipped to navigate emotionally-difficult situations, their inferior Fe is inclined to do all it can to defend itself. Hence, in emotionally intense or chaotic situations, INTPs may suddenly be overwhelmed with feelings of rage and anger, which, left unmitigated, may quickly transport them to the dark side.”

“While they can certainly derive great pleasure from reflection and contemplation, there are times when they fatigue of thinking, feel they have reached a dead end, or just want to “get out of their own head.” When this occurs, INTPs may struggle to find meaningful alternatives. Since their purpose and identity often revolve around N pursuits, they may view S activities as essentially pointless or mundane. This can create a situation in which their happiness seems to hinge almost entirely on the success of their N affairs. And since periods of inspiration and N success are bound to ebb and flow, they may find themselves trapped in a sort of bipolar existence—ecstatic one moment, down and depressed the next.”

“The problem is that INTPs are not nearly as nice as the nice guy persona suggests. Their extraverted side is more of a social façade than a true representation of their inner selves. It therefore seems appropriate that INTPs, as well as their partners, take an honest look at who the INTP really is (and is not). Generally speaking, INTPs are not social butterflies with strong interests in the lives of others. They are more like lone wolves, fiercely independent and absorbed in their own thoughts and affairs.”

“Since Fe is INTPs’ inferior function, it is often more sensitive and less resilient than it is in FJ types. This can make INTPs extremely uncomfortable in emotional situations, especially those involving potential conflict or disharmony. Because of their Fe's concern for maintaining external harmony (or what may be better understood as its discomfort with disharmony), INTPs may abstain from expressing their judgments in order to avoid unsettling others. While not as overtly warm or effusive as FJ types, INTPs can be sensitive to others’ feelings and may go out of their way to avoid hurting or offending them. For instance, in the midst of a discussion, an INTP may want to explain how human mating practices are primarily a product of evolutionary pressures. But if she suspects that others may take offense to such an explanation, she may withhold it to avoid introducing disharmony. Although functioning as superficial peacemakers, INTPs are generally slower to go out of their way to help others (at least in direct, hands-on ways). Especially early in their development, most forgo community service and avoid investing extensive time and energy helping others. This is particularly evident when under stress. If burdened by too many external pressures or demands, INTPs' willingness to help others is one of the first things to go. In short, INTPs’ Fe is more concerned with preserving harmony than it is with extensive helping. This is especially true early in life, when they have yet to achieve their Ti goals. Once those goals have been satisfactorily met, however, they may become more benevolent. We can see this with Einstein, for instance, who displayed increasing beneficence and generosity toward people in the second half of his life.”

“Music, in particular, can have a powerful effect on INTPs, stirring their Fe in what can feel like divine and powerful ways.”

“INTPs seem more inclined toward cerebral narcissism than most other types. While Vaknin sees the narcissist’s chance of recovery as relatively slim, I tend to disagree, especially for those with milder cases. In my experience, as INTPs mature and develop, their need for ego affirmation gradually diminishes and is supplanted by a healthier sense of self-worth.”

“INTPs desperately want to know who they are, how they should live, and the sorts of things they should be doing. Similar to other IN types, INTPs see it necessary to understand themselves—their personality, interests, abilities, and values—before they can act in the world with any degree of confidence or conviction.”

“INTPs can be hoarders and misers of time. Their objective is to maximize time to themselves for exploring and developing their interests. So whenever another person enters their personal space, INTPs may worry over what might happen to their cherished time. If INTPs are happy in their careers, time may be a relative non-issue, since they will have plenty of time to satisfy their Ti and Ne at work. If not, however, they may come to see their partner as a potential threat to their time and freedom. With all that said, what would seem an admirable reason for INTPs to participate in a relationship is out of genuine interest in their partner. This would typically involve a love for his or her mind and ideas, the type of partner David Keirsey has dubbed a “mindmate.”

“First, the moment INTPs stop sharing certain thoughts with their partners is the moment they begin to detach from and devalue them. At that moment, the INTP is no longer relating to his or her partner, but has chosen to become a free agent. Second, when INTPs fail to share their thoughts, the relationship immediately becomes less interesting to them. Remember, the most honest and authentic reason for INTPs to be in a relationship is to learn and explore with their partner. So as soon as they turn down an independent path and start moving away from their partner, they have forsaken the primary purpose of the relationship.”

“While their Ti pushes for closure, Ne counters by rallying for more options and alternatives. In many cases, Ne wins out, interjecting just enough new or contradictory information to keep INTPs in a state of indecision. Indeed, it is not uncommon for INTPs to feel entirely confident one day, only to feel ambivalent and uncertain the next.”

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