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Peter and the Starcatchers
Dave Barry
Top 10 Best Quotes
“If Peter was nine, and a new boy came to St. Norbert’s Home for Wayward Boys who said he was ten, why, then, Peter would declare himself eleven. Also, he could spit the farthest. That made him the undisputed leader.”
“Black Stache had no love for the Queen, no love for women of any sort, except for his ma. He had a real soft spot for his ma, and was truly sorry for the time he’d marooned her.”
“Nobody understands how hard it is, being a captain.”
“If Black Stache laughed, you laughed. If he snarled, you snarled. If he breathed in your direction, you ran for cover.”
“He felt a momentary pang of regret that he had not spent more time with his beloved wife. But it passed when he remembered that the reason he’d gone to sea in the first place was that he had never really liked his beloved wife.”
“My name—or the English version of my name—is Fighting Prawn.” “Fighting Prawn?” said Alf. “Does my name amuse you, Englishman?” said Fighting Prawn. “No,” said Alf, his grin evaporating. “If I may ask,” said Fighting Prawn, “what is your name?” “Alf,” said Alf. “Alf,” repeated Fighting Prawn. He said something to the other Mollusk’s, which included “Alf.” They roared with laughter. Fighting Prawn turned back to Alf. “In our language,” he said, “Alf means squid poop.”
“Who are you?” he said. “And why are you shouting?” “I’m your first officer, sir,” said Slank. “Mr. Slank. I’m just relaying your orders to the crew.” “Ah,” said Pembridge. “The aft binnacle has been cast off, sir,” said Slank. “The what?” said Pembridge. “The aft binnacle,” said Slank. “As you ordered.” “I did?” said Pembridge, squinting suspiciously. “When?” “Just now, sir,” said Slank. Pembridge blinked at Slank. “Who are you, again?” he said. “You first officer, sir,” said Slank. Pembridge blinked again. “My head hurts,” he said. “Perhaps the captain would like to go to his cabin,” said Slank. “You don’t tell me was to do,” said Pembridge. “I’m the captain.” “Yes, sir,” said Slank. “I’m going to my cabin,” said Pembridge.”
“He could even think about how fast he was thinking about things.”
“But if I hadn't shoved you off the boat back there,you'd be lost at sea now,wouldn't you? We'd all be lost! So thanks to me you're all standing on land." (Pirates, its a good thing they're idiots)”
“Sir,” James asked, “what are we going to do?” “We’re going to look for water,” said Alf. “And food?” said Tubby Ted. “Water first,” said Alf. “We can go days without food.” “We can what?” Tubby Ted shouted.”
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Book Keywords:
humorous